What five words best describe your show this year?

Live lesbian sex on stage.

Which comics should be more famous than they are now?

Whatever happened to those nice guys Matt Lucas and David Walliams? The little one used to do an act called Sir Bernard Chumley; never seen him since. And the taller one, the Peter Cook-ish one, he lived around the corner from me. Where are they now, eh?

Can you tell me one strange thing that you've heard about Edinburgh in August that you really wished was true?

The cab drivers love the festival and all the work it brings to them. Why, they're happy to take you anywhere.

Name one dead comedian that you wish was still alive and working today?

Linda Smith. A sad, sad loss. She was brighter than all of us.

Tell us one thing that you'd like to change about the comedy industry?

I don't think there are enough young Irish men involved in it. We need more.

Gilded Balloon Teviot, 668 1633, 18-25 Aug (not 21), 7.30pm, £11.50–£12.50 (£10.50–£11.50).