Afternoon Craig. Is it a great day for America? I don’t get into that anymore. But it’s a nice, sunny day in New York.

Flexibility with the truth gets a bad press. Is Pants On Fire reclaiming dramatic licence? I’m admitting exaggeration, for the sake of effect, is part of my stock in trade. You know films ‘based on a true story’? Well, everything’s based on a true story! Sometimes I base closely. Sometimes loosely. Names have been changed to protect the innocent and shield the guilty.

How’s the tour going? You’ve said you were hoping to wind down but then added more dates. Yeah, because I’m 63. I thought I’d better start sewing or shuffleboard. But I’ve always loved stand-up my whole career and I’d be writing anyway. If I wasn’t touring, I’d end up hanging around New York comedy clubs, doing it for nothing.

Does the show change in Europe? It changes from town to town, night to night. I don’t work from a tight script. I know the stories I’m telling, the order they come in. But I keep it fresh. There are a couple of Hollywood stories I didn’t dare tell when I was there. Nothing too salacious. And no politics. Hosting late night, you cover that a lot. I enjoy not talking about it; audiences appreciate it. All those things you’re angry about will wait. Your firmly held opinions are not at risk. You can be indignant when you leave.

Any trepidation about performing in Glasgow? If you’re a performer who doesn’t fear Glasgow, something’s wrong. I don’t want to overstate the case, but it’s further on the DEFCON scale than Swindon. I’m not nervous. The hometown is always a little more important though.

It’s been a while, hasn’t it? I honestly can’t remember. I don’t know if I’ve played Glasgow sober. And I’ve been sober 33 years. I’ve done plays but no stand-up there, I don’t think, since the 90s.

Will you do a meet-and-greet afterwards? Immediately or my auntie Betty will be furious. The amount of family coming, I’ll be lucky if anyone buys a ticket because the guest list will be huge.

So auntie Betty’s real? Oh yeah! I was at a family wedding and explained that I mentioned her in my last special. And she was like ‘whoa! You’re not giving away my secrets are you?!’ Everything’s fine. I think. We’ll see when I see her.

What were nights bartending in the Ubiquitous Chip like? Back then, the Chip was the only Glasgow bar selling Fürstenberg on tap: extremely potent lager. You’d get a lot of university professors, BBC staff and performers; three or four pints, they’d be fucking hammered. It was very volatile, hilarious and essential training for stand-up. Late-night hosting too. Corralling drunks with big egos into behaving is a similar skill.

Which of your late-night interviews still stand out? I did five shows a week, 250 shows a year for 10 years. Some I liked, some I didn’t. Plenty I don’t remember. I knew Stephen Fry a bit but we became close afterwards. First-name terms with someone as important to me as Billy Connolly was wonderful. Robin Williams became my friend, Carrie Fisher too. And Betty White, who I worked with when I first came to America. We stayed friends until she died.

Do you recall Bing Hitler fondly? I do. I was young and crazy and, you know, full of gumption and enthusiasm. It was, perhaps, a little less honed in the stagecraft. But the energy was great. The Edinburgh Fringe, 1986, upstairs at the Café Royal, was a real turning point in my life. I would go on stage at 1.30am. And for the first couple of nights to half a dozen drunks. Then I got a good review. And I remember getting off that Glasgow train; there was a line around the block and I thought the fire alarm had gone off. Someone told me it was for Bing Hitler. God, that felt amazing!

How did you end up as stuntman Callum Coburn in Still Game? Greg and Ford were at my house in Los Angeles, sitting by my pool. And they asked. They had me falling down stairs, in a car crash, my willy bitten off by a dog, and in the canal. Laughing their asses off, me swimming, fucking raging. They’d told me I’d only have to pretend to have a stiff hip.

What do you reckon the Craig Ferguson who played in punk bands would make of you now, into Schubert and Greek philosophy? Oh, young me would hate me. But young me didn’t think beyond the end of his nose. Or outside any bar he was in. I had highly localised emotions.

What’s driving you creatively? Well, I approach things on a case-by-case basis. Do I have any overriding ambitions? None beyond getting my cholesterol down. The rage and despair has calmed a bit, without me losing my enthusiasm. But stuck in traffic on a hot day, suddenly I’m the same asshole I always was.

Cheers Craig, good luck with the show. Do come along, I’ll introduce you to auntie Betty. You’ll find out if I’ve been talking shit the whole time.

Craig Ferguson: Pants On Fire tour has been rescheduled to 2026; O2 Shepherd's Bush Empire, London, Friday 24 April; O2 Academy, Glasgow, Sunday 26 April.