First record you ever bought
Adam Ant – 'Prince Charming'. I was precociously young to buy a record and dressed up like him to listen to it.

Last extravagant purchase you made
A large kebab. It was the size of a man’s arm. I almost lost consciousness trying to eat it.

First film you saw that really moved you
Watership Down. The second most upsetting film scene involving a rabbit after Fatal Attraction.

Last lie you told
I find it almost impossible to lie. It is a character flaw.

First movie you ever went on a date to
The Fox and the Hound. I remember saying to my Mum, ‘I’m 11, I should be out playing football not going out with girls.’

Last time you cried
A couple of years ago. I was exhausted and things got the better of me. Other than that I can’t remember the last time I cried.

First thing you do when you’ve got time off work
Think about work. I find it very hard to relax. I have to be tricked into drinking sedative-spiked milk like BA in The A-Team.

Last great meal you cooked
I did a rather nice courgette, mint, lemon juice and feta salad the other day. Yes I am middle-class.

First crush
A girl I met on a residential study course during my A Levels. I was nerdy and she was beautiful. I wrote her lots of letters and sent her mixtapes. I found them recently. I was simultaneously touched and embarrassed by my younger self.

Last book you read
The Sisters Brothers by Patrick deWitt. It’s a beautifully written western that was on the Booker shortlist.

First great piece of advice you were given
My PE teacher on our first day at ‘the big school’: ‘The thing about PE lads is you must never think. You’re on a trampoline – then you think – and you get hurt.’ He actually said that. I have been thoughtless ever since.

Last time you were star struck
I met Steve Guttenberg when he was doing panto in Bromley. He showed me his pectoral implants.

First thing you’d do if you ran the country
Bring down rail fares. Or end poverty. It’s a toss up.

Last meal on earth - what would it be
Fish fingers and potato waffles. I am famous for consuming mostly ‘golden food’ (ie things covered in breadcrumbs).

First song you’ll sing at karaoke
’Ice Ice Baby’. I know all the words.

Last time you exploited your position to get something
I’m really bad at blagging but I did manage to get my whole honeymoon paid for. Don’t know quite how I did that.

First time you realised you were famous
I was in the Faroe Islands recently and a Romanian man ran across a crowded dancefloor to hug me and tell me he was a big fan of my work.

Last time someone criticised your work
People criticise my work all the time. They’re called producers and script editors and it’s their job. Hopefully it makes it better though.

First three words your friends would use to describe you
He’s late again.

Last time you made an impulse buy and regretted it
I bought a top in TK Maxx. It turned out to be a rogue ladies top in the men’s section. It hangs strangely where my breasts should be.

First concert you ever attended
Guns N’ Roses at Gateshead International Stadium. Faith No More, the support act, played them off the stage.

Last time you bought someone flowers
For my Gran’s funeral sadly.

First object you’d save from your burning home
My wife. Or the fantasy Hip Hop self portrait that hangs over my desk. It’s a toss up.

Last funny thing you saw online
A bear waving. What hope do we mere human comedians have – all the funniest things online are made my animals.

First job
I worked in a wine bar whilst I was student. No customers ever came in and we were paid to sit around eating cheese and playing Risk.

Last person you fantasized about
I had a strange conversation at the BBC Christmas party about if I’d ‘go gay’ for Johnny Depp. I’d be tempted – he scrubs up well for a middle aged man.

First word you spoke
‘Lala’ according to my Mum. It was a multi-purpose word that covered lots of things.

Last crime you committed
I regularly steal condiment sachets from canteens. I believe it is immoral to charge for a basic necessity like ketchup.

First song at your (potential) wedding
I had a real wedding last year. We had a Swedish Elvis impersonator called Ken Wegas. He sang ‘Love Me Tender’.

Last song at your funeral
I am superstitious so don’t like to think about this, but definitely something by Roxette.

First person you’d thank in an award acceptance speech
Lil’ Kim.

Last thing you recommended to someone
Jimmy Cliff’s cover version of ‘Guns of Brixton’. It is a gem.

First thing you think of when you wake up in the morning
How annoying the snooze function on my alarm clock is. I think this because my wife tells me.

Last thing you think of before you go to sleep
That I must try and stop the snooze function in the morning before it annoys my wife.

Danny Robins presents a Swedish music documentary for BBC 6Music on Sat 28 Jan.

Danny Robins Showreel

Adam & The Ants - Prince Charming

Vanilla Ice - Ice Ice Baby

Kodiak Bear Waving

Jimmy Cliff - Guns of Brixton